Cindi Silva Poetry

poetry, haiku, prose, writing

there was a not yet old woman who lived in a nightmare|

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Some poet friends of mine told me I should publish this one. Wanted to share it with you. Sometimes so many things broadside you at once that you’re not sure whether you should laugh or scream. I say go ahead and scream first, then scream with laughter. You can get through whatever it is! I have confidence in you! Peace.

 

 

 

There was a not yet old woman

who lived in a nightmare

she had so many growing problems

she didn’t know what to do

 

 

maybe this could be called

Full Catastrophe Living 

In Modern Times

 

 

she had two children to raise

and a divorce settlement 

too contentious to contend with

on her own

 

 

which had  been going on for 

nearly four long years

there was debt incurred during that

marriage and after separation

that she could no longer manage

 

 

there was a car she was forced to buy

after the separation because

she needed a car to make it 

easier to get things done

and after paying the current payment

but not the previous 2 payments

 

 

her car was repossessed

and all that was in it

to her surprise one morning

when she went looking for it 

in front of her tiny apartment

(that felt like it was the size of a shoe

and the inspiration for this poem)

on her way to dropping her son off

to baseball camp

and her daughter running late

for a doctor’s appointment

which she was forced to reschedule

 

 

this caused her amagdalia center

to overload and a terrific headache

soon ensued

as she started walking back home

after the 30 minute walk to her son’s day camp

she wanted to rest and shower

and be fresh

 

 

before looking for work that afternoon

so she could reclaim her car

and reclaim her life

and not ever again see the look of horror

despair, and ensuing tears 

on her children’s faces

as they came to grips

with the secret she could no longer

keep from them

that their whole world had been rocked even more

 

 

there was a not yet old woman

who was used of living

a life of ease

with a beautiful home

and a good job

and a nice car

and a marriage that sadly had to be ended

 

 

which spiraled her to poverty

into a world where she didn’t know how 

to play by the rules or what the rules even were

or worse yet how to pay the bills

and come out ahead

she had difficulty processing 

so much change in such a little 

amount of time

 

 

and  there was a suspicious mass

on her breast that she knew she needed to take care of

and she knew quickly figuring out all the

accumulating problems 

was of paramount importance

and she felt she was running out of time

and her amagdalia center wasn’t very happy 

right about now

 

 

there was a not yet old woman

who didn’t know how to tap 

into the money from the proceeds

of the sale of her  house which

were being held hostage-like

in trust by each side’s attorney

since she couldn’t stay in the marriage

because he was too controlling

and she was too afraid to stay

 

 

and she now was wondering

if the new trade-offs for independence

and safety were worth

the sacrifices she had already made

she couldn’t decide which was worse

staying in a dangerous marriage

or going through a catastrophic divorce

during a depression

 

 

there was an old woman 

who lived in a nightmare

she had so many problems 

she didn’t know what to do

 

 

 

 

tags: Youtube| best| poetry| blogs| Cindi Silva| Cindy Silva| poetry| mindfulness walks| nursery rhymes| overcoming| hard times| breast cancer| scary times| 

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Author: Cindi Silva Poetry

I'm an artist, poet, writer, activist and more. I like writing about the ordinary and transforming it to extraordinary, which I think it already is but you may have been to busy to notice. Sometimes I write about politics, love, relationships, and every day strife. If you like my blog, I invite you to follow me. Thanks for stopping by. Peace and great joy to you always! Cindi

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