Cindi Silva Poetry

poetry, haiku, prose, writing


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there was a not yet old woman who lived in a nightmare|

Some poet friends of mine told me I should publish this one. Wanted to share it with you. Sometimes so many things broadside you at once that you’re not sure whether you should laugh or scream. I say go ahead and scream first, then scream with laughter. You can get through whatever it is! I have confidence in you! Peace.

 

 

 

There was a not yet old woman

who lived in a nightmare

she had so many growing problems

she didn’t know what to do

 

 

maybe this could be called

Full Catastrophe Living 

In Modern Times

 

 

she had two children to raise

and a divorce settlement 

too contentious to contend with

on her own

 

 

which had  been going on for 

nearly four long years

there was debt incurred during that

marriage and after separation

that she could no longer manage

 

 

there was a car she was forced to buy

after the separation because

she needed a car to make it 

easier to get things done

and after paying the current payment

but not the previous 2 payments

 

 

her car was repossessed

and all that was in it

to her surprise one morning

when she went looking for it 

in front of her tiny apartment

(that felt like it was the size of a shoe

and the inspiration for this poem)

on her way to dropping her son off

to baseball camp

and her daughter running late

for a doctor’s appointment

which she was forced to reschedule

 

 

this caused her amagdalia center

to overload and a terrific headache

soon ensued

as she started walking back home

after the 30 minute walk to her son’s day camp

she wanted to rest and shower

and be fresh

 

 

before looking for work that afternoon

so she could reclaim her car

and reclaim her life

and not ever again see the look of horror

despair, and ensuing tears 

on her children’s faces

as they came to grips

with the secret she could no longer

keep from them

that their whole world had been rocked even more

 

 

there was a not yet old woman

who was used of living

a life of ease

with a beautiful home

and a good job

and a nice car

and a marriage that sadly had to be ended

 

 

which spiraled her to poverty

into a world where she didn’t know how 

to play by the rules or what the rules even were

or worse yet how to pay the bills

and come out ahead

she had difficulty processing 

so much change in such a little 

amount of time

 

 

and  there was a suspicious mass

on her breast that she knew she needed to take care of

and she knew quickly figuring out all the

accumulating problems 

was of paramount importance

and she felt she was running out of time

and her amagdalia center wasn’t very happy 

right about now

 

 

there was a not yet old woman

who didn’t know how to tap 

into the money from the proceeds

of the sale of her  house which

were being held hostage-like

in trust by each side’s attorney

since she couldn’t stay in the marriage

because he was too controlling

and she was too afraid to stay

 

 

and she now was wondering

if the new trade-offs for independence

and safety were worth

the sacrifices she had already made

she couldn’t decide which was worse

staying in a dangerous marriage

or going through a catastrophic divorce

during a depression

 

 

there was an old woman 

who lived in a nightmare

she had so many problems 

she didn’t know what to do

 

 

 

 

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ink|

A poet friend of mine liked this poem and posted it to his fb wall. Hope you will too. Peace!

Ink|

When I want to escape
you always take me there
I can be anywhere else
that I’d rather be
I can soar like a majestic bird
return to my favorite tree
and warble songs of my adventures
past, present and future
play out things
I would never want to try
rewrite experiences I’d rather change
predict outcomings that never were
but one day I might like to see
return like a soldier returning from battle
or imagine I’m a southern belle
on a hot summer’s evening
sipping a mint julep on my veranda
without a care in the world
I can live anywhere in the universe
why limit it to the world
I can be stronger, braver,
wiser, younger, older,
the voice of the people
the voice of the disadvantaged
the hungry, the homeless, the poor
the weak, the meek
whoever I choose
at a flick of my pen
and at a whim
A friend, lover, or muse
a rocket traveling through space
a time traveler rewriting history
step in and out of time
and best of all
take you there with me
with my poetic tools
made of spilled blood
heart, soul and my imagination
INK

July 15, 2012

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strugging|

Of mice and men
Of kings and queens
Of shopping carts
Filled with groceries
Being pushed down the
Street
To a new home
At a decreased income level
Disapproving stares
From cars driving by
Damn this caste system
In the warmth of the suns

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Oakland Sweeps Yankees|

Did you see the yellow butterfly
With black stripes
flying overhead
While oakland was tying
The yankees
I wonder
How many other
Fans in the packed stadium
Noticed the miracle
In the flight of the butterfly
That day

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just sayin|

Just Sayin’|

Is it that I’m stronger than you
Is it that I’m more creative than you
Is it that I’m more inventive than you
Of course not
If you were in my shoes
You’d probably do the same thing

 

 

 

 

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children are casualties of war|

I wish you could
understand
It’s time to stop
Punishing me
I wish you could
Put the past
In the past
no one wins
By dragging this out
No one wins by
Taking it all
The children are
Always the casualties
Of divorce
Please be fair and
Leave me alone

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waiting is the hardest part| II|

Watching
The time unfold
relaxing, napping
Reading, talking
Doctor’s orders to
Listen to my body
And give myself
permission to do
Nothing but just be
Although it feels awkward
I’m up for the challenge

 

 

 

 

 

 

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